On my way to a funeral I was conducting and had to cross the Kingston Bridge at 8.30 am. Those who have to do this regularly have stamina, patience, and an abuility to endure tedium way beyond my meagre reserves.
But it wasn’t as bad as I thought and I was able to go into the Garden Centre off the motorway at 9.01 am. Which was a bit early for the counter staff who were still putting on the aprons and getting ready to serve us customers. I was there for a latte and a scone just coming out the oven, when I was given the best excuse / explanation / reason for being a wee bit late I’ve heard for a long while.
"Sorry I’m a bit later" she said. "Ah had that many Valentines tae open".
I’d just been listening to the radio and the news that to send an e-valentine is now considered by many employers to be an unwanted advance, and could lead to dismissal. I mentioned this to my Valentine delayed friend who snorted, (and I quote her exactly) " Whit? Valentines by email? Ah’d juist delete them. They’re beneath contempt! Naw. Ah like the Victorian wans, hand made, and wi’ the price still on them tae let ye see how much they spent!"
I hoped she was indeed late for work because of the volume of Victorian hand-made cards, with the price visible.
As I left she shouted, "Have a good Valentine’s day yersel".
St Valentine’s day is a celebration of love. I suppose a lot of what we say and buy and sing and do to declare our love can be transient and flippant, or funny and affirming, and maybe even genuine and sincere. Cards, flowers, daft verses, jewellery, romantic meals – a whole industry based on romance, and why not?
The funeral I was conducting was of a family friend, and he and his wife had been married for 60 years and 6 months. Now when it comes to declarations of love, I think 60 years of passionate caring, faithful companionship, shared journeying, and well kept promises, is a demonstration of what human love is capable of. Faithful friendship that grows out of the passionate yes of two people to each other sixty years ago, is a beautiful gift, both to those who make such commitments, and to those of us around them who see what love looks like when we are given the long view of it.
"Have a good Valentine’s day yersel" I was wished. For all the sadness that is inevitable in the separation of a lifelong relationship, that’s just what I’ve had. These three abide – faith, hope, and love – but the greatest of these is love. And sometimes its most beautiful face is old.
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