Coffee and the complicated complexities of colour coded milk

In Garden Centre Tearoom.

Ask for a latte.

Then, hoping for a skinny latte I ask if they can do one with semi-skimmed milk.

Answer from smiling but bemused sales executive : "We've only got green milk or blue milk."

Now you need to be quick, domesticated and sure of your retail facts but I got it right away and first time.

"Green", I said.

Not the blue – which is full cream.

Not the red which they didn't have – which is skimmed.

But the green – semi skimmed.

Sales executive and customer happy.

Green or blue milk. Sectarianism. Sneaks in everywhere so it does!